Hopes & Worries

For the past year, two friends met at First Cup to enjoy great coffee and conversations about art and creativity. When given the opportunity to display our art, it took the better part of 2009 to find a recurring theme we wanted to share and exhibit. As both mothers and caretakers, our conversations often centered around how to remain balanced between nurturing and smothering, hopes and worries. Eventually, we each found a medium and inspiration to express the stories of our daily lives.

Have you ever worried so much about providing a nurturing environment for your child that it feels toxic? Do you feel fragile at times about how to care for the world? Do you feel both hopeful and overwhelmed by the small progress we make individually each day?

This is an art show that begins with worry and ends in wonder. It is simultaneously nurturing and fragile because that is how parenting feels. Whether parenting children, caring for ourselves, our community or the world at large, this art is offered as one-page stories about the tension, faith and hopes in every day life. It is a glimpse into the treasury of emotion we each carry.

What hopes and worries do you carry?

This is the inspiration behind the work we chose to do.
It meant a lot to both of us and we hope it means a little something to you.

To see more of Julie's work, check out: http://www.larocheart.blogspot.com/

Our art will show through the month of December
at First Cup on Woodstock.

TOXIC

This painting is an illustration of the problem of loving too much! You may not like it and it wasn't meant to be pretty. It was an important exercise for me to figure out how to do it and practice the process of turning what is inside my head into something others can see and hopefully understand. I am still discovering what kind of art I want to make. There is the art that is made to sell . . . and the art that is meant to tell. This piece has a story . . .

Last Summer I signed Nate up for Nature Camp, a week long day camp in Oaks Bottom Wildlife Refuge. It was to be his first camp experience. He has been attending classes through Parks & Rec. at Community Centers since he was a baby, but those had all included parent involvement -so I got to attend too! Now that he is getting older, the rules are changing and I am not allowed to tag along. I understand the value of him having a life without me, but I'm not ready yet to just drop off and let go. Obviously, school is different, it is a familiar community. We know the teachers, we know the kids. It is hard to trust the UNKNOWN.

I think being the parent of only one child intensifies my dependency upon him. I've got all my eggs in one basket and I know it sounds a bit crass, but I have no back-up. At times I can be terribly preoccupied by all that can/could go wrong! I worry obsessively and am struggling to accept the fact that I cannot control the world that Nate lives in. I cannot prevent the other kids from hurting his feelings. I cannot prevent him from falling out of the tree and smashing his head wide open! I cannot prevent the driver from not seeing him in the bike lane and driving over him!! I cannot prevent the creepy stranger from jumping out of the bushes and nabbing him!!! If only I really could create a safety bubble for him, or a force-field of love and kindness. I do my best to give him the tools that he needs to survive, but I cannot protect him from everything . . . and I just HATE that!

As I was stressing the night before sending Nate to camp, I had a vivid nightmare of a nest built of broken glass. I don't usually have dreams that include such cool imagery, so I knew this was something I had to do something with. I had worked myself up into such a tizzy that I almost threw up after dropping him off that morning. I came straight home and started breaking bottles! My artistic passion fizzled when I couldn't figure out how to attach the glass to the board. I had been looking forward to spending the week in my studio, making art while Nate was at camp; falling into deep holes, getting lost in the woods and getting bitten by snakes. I have to admit that it was almost a relief when the Heat Wave hit and I could claim that it was inhumane to make him run around outside all day in 106 degrees! I didn't make any art that week and Nate only got one day of camp, but I think we both preferred to spend the quality time bonding with a waterfall in the Gorge instead.

Share the Road

I have titled this Calavera: 'Share the Road'. It is a tribute to all the cyclists who have been killed riding their bikes in the city. I created this piece specifically for the 'Muertos' show at Redux and it can still be seen there until Nov. 30th. It started with picking up bits of broken reflector in the street and feeling that each broken shard had a story to tell. I took the opportunity of being involved in this show to create something that I hoped would convey a message, it was a bit of a departure for me. I tried to keep it pretty -in the 'sugar skull' tradition, but I also let it bleed. For the most part, I enjoy art because it makes me feel good, but sometimes I get even more out of it when it makes me angry. I felt it was important to make something that might stir an emotional reaction and make others angry too. In my own little way, I hope to inspire an awareness: to SEE cyclists on the road, be courteous and drive safe (STOP driving over them!) -it's a matter of life and death!

El Hueso doesn't like this piece. He was instantly put off by the gory aspect. He had been enjoying my quirky little Calaveras until this one crossed the line. It's true that my work has been mostly lighthearted, decorative little musings meant to bring a smile and ease our fear. Let it be known, it is NOT my intention to glorify death or wallow in the dark side. My folks for example don't really get what I am doing, it just doesn't appeal to them at all. I understand that not everyone wants a skull on their wall! I know that death is a loaded subject and the last thing I want to do is offend anyone. But kids on the other hand, are totally drawn to my stuff. They don't have the baggage attached, they just think skulls are cool! Perhaps it's a generational thing. I want to know what you think. Be honest, be forthcoming, I'd love to hear your feedback.

warm & fuzzy

It's such a warm, fuzzy vibe when you can draw the community in to support handmade art and craft while benefiting the local Elementary school. Shopping becomes so much more meaningful when you know where your dollars are going and you can personally see who benefits. It feels so good to be a part of this community and go to a school that values art and is chock full of creative families. We had our first Bazaar last year and doubled our projected earnings for it. So this year, we doubled the amount of vendors and took over both the cafeteria and the gym! It always feels like a gamble when there's so much riding on it, but I think I can safely say that the 2009 Lewis Holiday Bazaar was a huge success! We are hoping to generate a reputation as the Hip place to start your Holiday shopping, and I think we're off to a good start. The caliber of our vendors is impressive; from our very own first graders to the royalty of Indie Craft! I am grateful to every one of them for being a part of it! Spread the word and come back next year, Lewis loves you!

graves are the footprints of angels

We spend our lives postponing death; dreading it, fearing it, cheating it. But the fact remains that there is no escape. The more we are able to accept our fatality, the more meaningful we can make our lives, the more passionately we can love and the more present we can be. Embrace life until it is our turn to embark on the unknown journey into what may lie ahead. I am working on this. Working on changing my perspective. Banishing my stress, my worry and my fear and learning how to just peacefully BE.

Today is El Día de los Muertos or All Souls' Day. It is a time to celebrate and remember our loved ones. Honoring their spirits is a way to keep our memories of them alive. Today I am remembering two Rubys. One very young and one very old. Grandpa Ru passed away August 19th, 2009. Born Reuben, some people called him Ruby, but we all called him Ru. As I look at his picture, I can see a twinkle in his eye and I hope he can feel the love in my heart.

I am happy to say that the tradition of celebrating Day of the Dead is ALIVE and WELL in PDX! It seems this year, more than ever, there are gallery shows, sugar skull making, processions and altars all over town. I find it both enlightening and encouraging! This month, I have been fortunate enough to be included in a 'Muertos' show at Redux on Burnside. I am in the company of 22 other incredible artists -which is a big thrill for me! You can see all the work from the show on this gallery blog. -But please be sure to visit Redux some time this month, you are sure to find many treasures there. The show runs from 10/27 - 11/29. Opening Reception is First Friday, THIS FRIDAY, 11/06 from 6 - 10pm.

And on the subject of the moment, I would like to share a few quotes I have gathered. . .

As a well-spent day brings happy sleep, so a life well used brings happy death. ~Leonardo da Vinci

Death is beautiful when seen to be a law, and not an accident - It is as common as life.
~Henry David Thoreau, 11 March 1842, letter to Ralph Waldo Emerson

In the night of death, hope sees a star, and listening love can hear the rustle of a wing. ~Robert Ingersoll

Someday I'll be a weather-beaten skull resting on a grass pillow,
Serenaded by a stray bird or two.
Kings and commoners end up the same,
No more enduring than last night's dream.
~Ryokan

He spake well who said that graves are the footprints of angels. ~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

For what is it to die but to stand naked in the wind and to melt into the sun? ~Kahlil Gibran, from "The Prophet"

From my rotting body, flowers shall grow and I am in them and that is eternity. ~Edvard Munch

"If you cannot get rid of the family skeleton, you may as well make it dance."
-G.B. Shaw

Calaveras!

I am so excited to have my Calaveras on display at Fantasma! The show will be up all month. If you haven't been by yet, please drop in. The shop has lots of magical, mystical items for sale as well as some lovely marionettes handcrafted by Linda Rand. The shop owner Jessica Rega is on the lookout for handcrafted, locally made art, so if you make altars, shrines, tin art etc. you might want to check it out. My Calaveras feel very at home in her shop, but I'm sure they would love to come home with you too!

The Calavera series is inspired by the Mexican Sugar Skulls of Dia de los Muertos; the tradition of honoring loved ones who have passed and welcoming their spirits home for a festive visit to celebrate the best of life. In Spanish, Calavera refers to 'Death's head' and is intended as a whimsical way to mock death's power over us. I started painting the skulls as a way to process my grief over losing my friends. It has become a creative confrontation with my own mortality. It has been empowering and healing as a constructive way to Transform the immensity of such devastation into something intriguing, Lasting and beautiful.

Each skull is created from 3/4" thick reclaimed plywood which I cut out, sand and then paint. No two are ever the same! Personalities begin to emerge as I explore different techniques, materials and found objects. They serve as a striking reminder to celebrate the life we have and know now.

Later this month on Last Thursday, October 29th, there will be a Dia de los Muertos Procession on Alberta at 7pm. It will be a great opportunity to dress up, bring candles, photos and other offerings to honor those that you want to Remember. Come and join me in the festivities!

FANTASMA is at 2314 B NE Alberta Street

Remembering Ruby

Earlier this Summer while strolling down Alberta, I stumbled upon this new little shop called FANTASMA: an Altar space. I got all tingly as I stepped in and felt like I had found the golden key that would unlock the door that would send me forth on my chosen path. Could there be anywhere more perfect than this magical little shop of Mexican handicrafts, steeped in Day of the Dead Folk Art? We were meant for each other. I introduced myself to the owner and described the Calaveras I have been making. She liked my work and booked me! And here I am, the featured Artist and Altar builder for the entire month of October. Viva la BoneWerx!

This is the first altar that I have ever assembled. As a flower child, I grew up around various forms of altars to different gods, cats, poets, artists, relatives and friends. My parents, grandma and aunt have all been altar builders, it has been a family tradition. . . and now it is my turn. I consulted my aunt Zoe, an artist and educator in the Bay Area. She is the authority on Mexican Folk Art and gave me the traditional guidelines that I needed to begin with. In the end, I branched out with where my heart led me.

The altar I have created is an 'Ofrenda' to Ruby. It has been 2 years since Ruby was taken from this world and it has taken me this long to get to the place where I could do a piece about her. In the aftermath of the horrific event that stole her away, I knew I had to make something, but it felt too painful then. It has been nagging at me ever since yearning to come out in some way, but not knowing how. It feels very important for me to honor Ruby in this way; to remind the world that she was here - touched our lives - and we miss her.

Bright bud
Glowing Firecracker
Racing bug
Spunky Dream Catcher
Wild wildflower. . .
on the wind
blowing through my mind
blowing up my heart
scattering fire seeds
softly glowing
glowing
glowing
red.

I hope you will take the opportunity to visit the altar and celebrate the spirit of Ruby.

FANTASMA is at 2314 B NE Alberta Street